Thursday, September 17, 2009

Obama's New Missile Defense Shield: Duck and Cover

President Obama, in a move not to make those that would launch missiles against mad at us, has scrapped the missile defense shield implemented by President Bush. In its place, Obama will put into a place a much more scaled back missile defense system. The advantage of the new system is how it empowers each and every person to take part in the process. The way it works is simple. When you see a flash, simply duck and cover. If you happen to be in a school, duck and cover under your desk. If you are out on a picnic with your family, duck and cover, pulling the blanket over you and your family if possible. If you are walking along a street and you see the flash, duck and cover against a wall or curb. To unveil his new defense program of Duck & Cover, former President Clinton will appear in TV adds dressed in a turtle costume, an animal well known for its duck and cover abilities. President Clinton was selected for his skill in ducking and covering scandals. The former President was quoted as saying “I had 8 years as president and several decades of marriage to Hillary to practice my duck and covering skills. I told Barry that it would be an easy transition for me. “ The expected cost of the new program will be approximately 40 billion dollars. President Obama is expected to announce a duck and cover czar to implement the new program. Since former Soviet Block countries will be the most affected by the dropping of the missile defense shield, Obama also addressed these nations, “The way I see it (pause) you lived under an alleged tyranny(pause) for many years(pause) you should be used to ducking(pause) and covering(pause).

4 comments:

Kansas Bob said...

Too bad.. I was hoping to spend more money on that.. it is only 40 billion.

jrchaard said...

since the money doesn't really exist, why not make it 40 trillion.

Troy said...

It all reminds me of Spys Like Us. (and - Hey I would find an Icebox to hide in.)

jrchaard said...

Just like indiana Jones. The only thing missing from that scene was him emerging eating a chicken leg.